May 31, 2013 § 2 Comments

Out of service. May return soon. No guarantees.

Cynical T-Shirt – I’m a proud cynic.

April 25, 2013 § Leave a comment

cynical tshirt

They call me Mr Cynical

So I went off and found a Cynical T-Shirt. Why? Well, I’ve decided not to fight my natural inclinations any more. Let me tell you why I’m a cynic…

People. Yep, them. They are the reason. Sounds like I’m being unfair or bitter perhaps, but I’m not. People are the cause of every problem, every negative situation and everything else that sucks. Consider that. All the shit and awfulness in the world was caused by humanity. Oh sure, they’ve also created the wonder and the beauty, but you have to walk a long way to find it. The junk and wretchedness will be right in front of you. Seriously – just try it now. Look around you. I’ll bet you find something that upsets, annoys, depresses or irks you, we’ll before you find something that excites you or makes you happy. Now, because of all of this, I’ve decided to embrace my cynicism. That way, I expect the disappointment, and that makes it all easier to deal with. And in turn, when I do find one of the wonders of humanity, it’s not such a shock, and I can appreciate it with a cooler head. And that’s a win.

In true cynical tradition, this tee is brought to you by amazon.co.uk (that enormous, faceless, tax avoiding corporation). Sizes range from XS to XXXL, it comes in light blue, and will cost you between £14.99 and £18.99. So there. Deal with it.


A quick note: Follow me on bloglovin!

October 29, 2012 § Leave a comment

<a href=”http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/4160009/?claim=wxh2atp4dkz”>Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

What’s this thing, I imagine you saying in a slightly upset but still intrigued kind of way. This thing will now allow you to follow bigscarytees.com on bloglovin.com (if I’ve done it right). Just click on it and you can get updates from my blog alongside others which actually take themselves seriously. Do I take blogging seriously? Yes and no. Indeed, I will write useful things and give you plenty of links, but on the other hand, I will end blog posts from time to time with nonsensical phrases and silly things. Dribble matchbox paperback.

p.s. They made me do this. I had no choice! Don’t kill me!

p.s.p.s They didn’t really.

p.s.p.s.p.s And I don’t think you’d have actually killed me…

Controller Family Tree T-Shirt – That fruit ruined my thumbs.

June 14, 2012 § Leave a comment

controller tee

The best way to go green.

The Controller Family Tree t-shirt represents a large chunk of my life. In fact, it represents the best chunk of my life. All those hours spent, thumbs twitching, eyes bleeding… Good times.

Whether it was making Mario jump on stuff, making Tony Hawk pull off a ridiculous flat-land combo (despite him being a ramp skater), hacking my way through a billion goblins in Hyrule or simply fishing for bass, controllers have always been my friend. My constant companion. From the joystick to the Wii-mote (which isn’t on here as it has no wire) and beyond, up until my teenage years, it was the best thing I could have in my hand. Then I discovered smoking (I know what you were thinking – pervert!) but that just led me to work out ingenious ways to smoke and play video games at the same time. This controller tee reminds me of so many hours spent leveling up, killing stuff, solving puzzles and other worthwhile pursuits. It’s a fantastically designed shirt, and the way the wires make up the trunk and leaves is oh so clever. Any gamer would be proud to sport this t-shirt. Probably for several days at a time in a dark room.

So where can you get this homage to the history or arthritis? It comes from the Nerd-vana that is Thinkgeek.com where it’s available (only in green) in sizes S-XXL. And it’s a snip at only $24.99 too. Now I feel the urge to go kill some stuff on my tv. Which is a good thing.

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